I N V I T A T I O N    E T I Q U E T T E

Invitations are one of the most important parts to your big day – after all if you don’t have them you’ll have a very small party!

But there are rules surrounding how to word them correctly, here are some examples:

TRADITIONAL WEDDING

CIVIL CEREMONY

WIDOWED PARENT

 DIVORCED PARENTS

BRIDE AND GROOM AS HOSTS

REMARRIED MOTHER

EVENING INVITATION ONLY

CHANGING CIRCUMSTANCES

FAMILY BEREAVEMENT

'Owing to the recent death of Mr Alan Hanley, Mr and Mrs Barry Smith regret that they are obliged to cancel the invitations to the marriage of their daughter Phoebe to Mr Alexander Stuart.'

FOR A POSTPONEMENT

‘Owing to the illness of Mr Alexander Stuart, Mr and Mrs Barry Smith regret that they are obliged to postpone the invitations to the marriage of their daughter Phoebe at St Mary’s Church, Eling from Saturday 9th August to 2.00 pm on Saturday 4th October 2008.’

BEST TIME TO SEND INVITATIONS

The best time to send your invitations is around 3 months before your wedding. If your wedding is in prime summer time, however (June to September), invitations should be sent around 4-5 months before your wedding. Failing this, send a ‘save the date’ card and then follow it up with a formal invitation (although this can double the cost and postage!)

GOLDEN RULE – always put an RSVP date and make it about a month after posting; don’t leave it too long as people will file your invitation away thinking they have months to reply and might forget to send you an acceptance meaning you could have lots of chasing to do at a later stage!

Always send invitations to everyone, even close friends and family who will obviously be coming – it is easy to assume but try to be strict with yourselves, it will be easier to collate numbers and names if everyone has been formally invited, then you can be sure you have the correct figure down – a verbal yes is not enough and guests should be encouraged to put it in writing (unless you are positive they won’t let you down or it is difficult to ask)

Give your guests a week or so after the RSVP date and then start chasing, get some solid yes or no’s that way you can begin your preparations much earlier. There’s nothing worse than leaving it to the last minute!

Lastly, it is usually the bride’s parents or your wedding planner who will collate the invitations; they should also do the chasing and present a final number to you about a month before the day. They should keep you updated as to how the list is coming along and advice the venue of what your numbers should be.

Be aware of any minimum number requirements your reception venue might impose, ask what their guidelines and rules are regarding any changes – most venues will have a cut off point up to which they can except last minute changes in numbers. It is normal for caterers to charge for the requested number of guests even if not all of them turn up, after all they would have prepared and purchased ingredients for the number supplied by you but again be sure to check what their terms and conditions are and make sure you stick to them.

Information courtesy of  Isabella Weddings – Wedding and Event Planners